Chandigarh—Reliable sources in the state capital have revealed that in the upcoming cabinet meeting, the Punjab government in all likelihood is set to pass an order whereby all of Punjab’s forest will be made available to make Chopsticks and Datuns (traditional Indian toothbrush).
The idea as per information was proposed by a very senior cabinet minister who felt that since the trees in Punjab’s forests were malnutrition-ed and very thin, they would make great raw material for dental and food accessory industry.
The CM is believed to have given an immediate nod to the proposal terming it as a brainwave of an idea.
The minister, say sources, in a hurriedly convened meeting with the Punjab Chief Minister at the latter’s residence, took out a crumpled piece of paper from his Kurta pocket and updated the CM on facts and figures about Punjab’s dental problems and the adverse effects of toothpastes on tooth enamel.
According to our source, who, apparently was hiding behind the curtains, the idea caught the Chief Minister’s fancy when the minister had mentioned that more than half of the state’s population had ‘kidas’ (ants) in their teeth and it and would make a great political move to connect with such a large chunk of voters at one go.
The Chief Minister is reported to have summoned his principal secretary immediately by pressing the ‘ghanti’, ordering him to prepare a feasibility report immediately.
The move, say bureaucrats could save the new trees the government proposes to plant, as Datuns, if stacked properly could be well double up as fuel-wood.
Sources say the scheme was at an advanced stage of implementation and a letter has already been shot off to owners of Swiss company Vixen that makes one of the best axes since use of blunt axes could lead to serious environmental violations.
The government does not want to raise the hackles of NGO’s like Greenpeace and give them a chance to vitiate the existing peaceful atmosphere for which it has also called up few zoos to check if they have elephants , specialising in uprooting trees.
Not denying the move, a top officer in the CM secretariat said, "that since the government wanted to add value to this brilliant idea, it was considering manufacturing Chopsticks out of species that were not fit for datuns."
Chopstick as per him was the first cousin of datun, and this move would give a boost to agro-forestry in Punjab.
“Also, since China is sending so many things to Punjab, including pictures of Babaji, Punjab, it was felt must return the favour in equal measure,” he said while explaining the logic behind this new move.
"Our friends in China and Japan are fond of eating Chowmein and since wood is dwindling we have decided to sign a MOU with both the governments because we understand there are many children in both the countries who go to bed hungry if they don’t eat chowmein with Chopsticks," added the same officer.
Asked if this was intended to placate a fuming Japan that loaned almost eight hundred crores to save Punjab’s ecology, the officer rubbished the journalist by saying, "Japan on the contrary should be grateful to Punjab, because had the money been appropriately used, Japan would not have got chopsticks."
The concerned minister when contacted for further information refused to come on line and threw his mobile phone out of the car.
(This is a humour piece. Enjoy. June 5 is World Environment day)
No comments:
Post a Comment